Never under any circumstances startle a gnome. My neighbour had a gnome on his neatly mown lawn. One day he thought it would be funny to sneak up behind it and frighten it. The gnome suddenly gained height and he didn’t stop growing until he was as tall as my neighbour’s house.
The gnome picked up my neighbour between his finger and thumb and snarled at him with his gnashing teeth.
The gnome picked up my neighbour between his finger and thumb and snarled at him with his gnashing teeth.
My neighbour had resigned himself to his fate when to his surprise the gnome said, “That was the funniest trick I’ve ever known!” and then added laughing, “I’d much rather you did that now and again instead of neglecting me.”
3 comments:
There was a knight who reigned over Northern Ireland who was very funny. He had a strange nightmare about breaking his kneecap. Guess what happened next? The following day he tripped over a gnome and broke his kneecap.
A few days later he won a competition to get a phone. He was delighted. He had a good knowledge and always knew the answers.
He neglected to win fighting battles, so he was taken over by a foreign knight who always organised campaigns to win over his enemies. The second knight always knew right from wrong and was superbly talented. As the other knight was weaker he proved to be the better man.
On a noticeably cold night the funniest farmer in town, who was ninety years old, neglected to tie a knot in the rope around the gate of the henhouse. A cunning fox which came nightly entered the henhouse and pinned a hen against the henhouse. It started gnashing its teeth. The farmer scanning his farm for his prize winning hens heard the hens and threw a numpty gnome at the fox.
The next day the local newspaper interviewed the farmer, he said “ I am a knight in gnome armour to my hens. The fox got nought and I will reign on this farm until I am ninety-nine years old.”
By Philip
The was a knight who was very cunning and he always seemed to have a knot in his knickers. To be honest he dose not have much knowledge and it was quite noticeable but he did not know. There s a person who has reigned the country for ninety years and he died this morning. Down in a small city there was a raffle and whoever wins gets a gnome and i was the most funniest looking gnome i have ever seen and guess what, i won it.
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